why me

It's been a wild year for me and not a good one at all. I have been playing with females hearts to long and now I'm tried and I want to settle down and be with my family I have lost since saturday. No they not died or gone far away, just I have fuck up and there is no reason I can 't be talking to a female in a sexual matter. I had a beauiful woman at home can plz me right. But I find a way to messed things up. I know I can be faithful and be with one female and have friends as well while not be a dog without a bone. I ex never treated me wrong or slept with other man after i have put her though. So why I can't be like that say, whom I'm with and be happy. Was I happy yes very happy it may seem that I wasn't but I was. I got son that just smile at me and that put tears in my eyes to see me leave him. Since I was there from child birth and holding him and watch him grow. Now it's going to hell cause I can't get my mind right. Now I have the time to do right and see this though. If any guys or ladies reading this it's not wroth the drama or the heartache. Cause when it comes down to it who are you truly hurting.